“When a Christian man and woman systematically deny their own physical desires as an expression of mutual faith and submission to Jesus Christ, they are laying a solid spiritual foundation for their marriage. They’re learning to fight sin as a team. They’re learning to care for each other, pray for each other, and challenge each other. In the most practical of ways, they are submitting to Jesus Christ as the Lord of their relationship.”—Joshua Harris (via set-apartgirl)
So I found out I got a pay raise just recently for going full caseload… I learned that my coworkers that trained the same time as me are ahead a month… I feel like I’m falling behind and I need to have zero errors by June… it’s really counting down to those final moments… I hope I pass… Time to work on my time management and re-focus my work!
Now that it’s crunch time for the wedding I lost another 5 lbs :) Pretty proud of myself watching my weight… No drinking and keeping track on what I eat… I’m going back to my old ways and I don’t drink heavily as much… Working out at least 30 min everyday I’m pretty proud on top of all my planning and casework… I’m at a good spot right now :]
My perfect date night: I pick you up. In my Kia Sorrento. You get in. There’s candles in the car. You go, ‘…Is that dangerous?’ and I go, ‘Yes—but I like danger.’
We go to your favorite restaurant, and we have a fantastic meal. We come outside and we see my car’s on fire. You go, ‘Aziz, your car’s on fire. Aren’t you upset?’ I pull out a bag of marshmallows and I go, ‘No. I knew this was gonna happen.’
“Friendship - my definition - is built on two things: respect and trust. Both elements have to be there. And it has to be mutual. You can have respect for someone, but if you don’t have trust, the friendship will crumble.”
I have no time to waste and feel sorry for your situation… If you want to play victim go ahead… Like I said before, stop the whining and complaining and do something about it and be the better person… Turns out you’re still the kid that still wants her baby bottle… Grow up!
Lately I used to be the one that always plans everything, always trying to please other people out of my own expense… I’m so happy to be w/ people that have treated me out as a sweet gesture to return the favor and not once do I embellish it out of ones own inconvenience For once, I feel like a true friendship… not one sided where I did all the work and they blame me for actually doing something about it.. and them for not doing anything about it at all. With wedding planning, renewing our rental agreement and finding my “unwinding” time, I’m glad to have the support and understanding from fellow coworkers. Not people telling other people what they should and shouldn’t do but actual listeners and in depth thoughtful words of advice that really puts my life in retrospect. I don’t need other people’s acknowledgement of acceptance nor their criticisms of how life is “supposed to be.” At times I feel indecisive, I reflect and find my way on my own.. I don’t blame other people on my decisions… I only would only blame myself.. I blame myself for putting my guard down and giving people the benefit of the doubt. This time around as years past, I’m going to observe my surroundings and truly open up to “real” people.. People that have their own passions, interests and goals in their life… people that do something about it rather than people that grieve about their limitations. Keep thinking positive and keep moving forward that’s all I have to say.
Weird to say… My future hubby and I had a brief convo about the day we die.. my work I have 1 retirement plan, two 401k’s and 3 life insurances so I recently updated my beneficiaries… we started making preperations on our burial plots too… Looks like I have a plot at the Forest Lawns too now w/ my habubi 0_o The future for us is starting to get real and preparing our future legacies.. pretty darn proud!
So I finally have my caseloads… 140 cases w/ 300+ programs to start out and will increase from there after 6 months of 100% audited work. I find it interesting when you start to notice habits people have. You learn exactly who the type of person they are and already have expectations of what is going to happen. I’ve learn today to keep it simple, think before I say anything and just recognize what type of situations people go through because some people can be at their wits end and any help you provide is better than nothing…
I had the opportunity to meet w/ the Chief of Investigations in my department and told him I really hope to promote to a position under his unit. My ego is beginning to build… But smack myself back to reality and reminded myself to first past probation now before take anymore steps forward lol
Words that needed to be heard. He went through a similar situation where he had to grow up quickly and put his life on the back burner. He really inspired my to what I need to do next. Time to take it one step at a time.
This past 4 months I have been non-stop planning for other people. No one has ever understood that I have my own wedding to tend to too… I’m done helping people out and I’m going to stop playing nice unless they are willing to help pay off one of the many vendors. Time to go MIA and just focus on an amazing change in my life with my wonderful fiance that always put’s my thoughts into consideration on many of our decisions… and I’m thankful w/ the people that helped build our relationship. No more trying to impress other people and just happy to the people that have helped out on my wedding through it’s trail and tribulations. I’m very grateful for my bridal party and my new coworkers as well because they have been there from one chapter to the other. I have less than one month and I’ll be graduating from my Induction Training :) Time to embark on a new career!
“Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. They prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family. They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.”—
I’ve come to realize once again another phase of real friends vs. faux friends… I’m glad now that has succumb to choosing who I will send invites to for my wedding. It’s weird having to cut down my list on who I know is worthy of sending one but to me, it’s more on the value of real friendship… The ones that have been there before, now and I know that I’ll continue our friendship in the future… that to me is what it all boils to… not just the menial ways of facebook… it’s all about the “real” connection. Real life.